Destined For…

I share,
Because I care,
I’m on the Borderline,
But I’m aware!
An expert at reaching out to all of you everywhere,
Used to needing care myself but people not being there.
My vocabulary,
Elegant ability to articulate,
Does not mean I am serving you the full plate!
I’m a clever fox,
Full of empathy
But useless at reaching out for people to help me.
I’m scared because of my history,
People reprimanding me for my disability,
The blame,
The shame,
Has silenced me.
I say just enpugh to help,
To include,
To give hope,
But get none of this myself.
Silently I observe the love and care,
Time and effort,
People are prepared to give others,
But its never me.
I feel cursed,
So I try to flip it,
Turn my pain into another someones gain.
It works,
I’m a healer,
A teacher,
An advocate,
A facilitator,
But I am not as strong a warrior as I have you believe.
My acting talents help me deceive,
Like a magical scarf up a magician’s sleeve,
Scared to disclose all,
Because I don’t know if I can get up again after the next big fall.
I want a future now,
But what if that is not my purpose!?
Not what I am destined for!?