Day To Day

So small we all are,
So insignificant,
Just combinations of atoms and cells,
Yet we rate ourselves so highly.
I have come to lead a rather reclusive life,
Not by choice,
Simply by chance,
I think!?
Being alone leaves much time for thought,
And as I ponder,
Exercise the power of wonder,
I get overcome with sadness,
Questioning reason and such sorts.
Mourning those that we have lost.
Wondering why we can love at all,
When our hearts are so fragile and easily broken.
Contemplating our existence,
If we are only to diminish over time,
What is the purpose of being born at all?
Is life a gift?
Or is it a punishment?
How is it that we are all so different?
Our luck,
Our status.
Is it all down to chance?
Or is this world some type of purgatory,
It would explain how unbalanced the world is,
How cruel and unfair it can be.
How overly generous it can be.
We are not free to do as we please.
We are governed and manoeuvred by the fortunate ones with power.
Tangled in a web of lies,
Unable to open our eyes to what is really going on.
We get told,
We follow orders,
And make do.
There are laws, rules and guidelines that we must follow,
That is not at all, “Free Will”!
There is no room for eccentricity or individuality,
We are lead to believe so,
But then get punished when we think outside the box,
And have the courage to do so.
My mind is creative and penetrated by feeling free.
I can’t just conform and that is bad news for people like me,
As good as being banished,
stoned or hung,
They label you as someone with, “Ill Mental Health”,
When all I am doing is trying to be myself.
Yet I struggle to continue,
With all of this pain and strife.
I used to dream big,
I was encouraged to reach for the sky,
Did you always know that I wouldn’t get there,
That this misery would knock me down when I was young, carefree and eager to fly?
Was it always a lie?
Or did I just get stuck and run out of luck?
I no longer dream of tomorrow,
I just get by,
Day to day.

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