Loneliness Insomnia

Sleep is my hobby and escape,
A personal skill of perfection to the nine,
From which I acquired so naturally,
From the get go,
And yet tonight,
Despite being dosed up on my sanity medication,
Being fully prepared to escape reality and ill mentality,
I hoped to dream of unicorns and cotton candy,
Blissfully bobbing along on my all inclusive Mr Sandmans lullaby vacation,
Alas love is a powerful creation,
That has stirred something within,
My need to escape has shrunk,
As everyday has been a holiday,
But now you’ve gone away,
And the bitter side affect is insomnia,
Sleep deprivation,
As tonight my lover lies with me not,
And loneliness has returned,
A feeling I had unknowingly forgot.

You Sleep To Much

They say,
You sleep alot don’t you!?
I say.
They say,
Don’t you want to wake up,
Get up,
And breath the next day?
Quite rarely!
I say.
Sleep for you,
It is simply what you are obliged to do,
Something you have to get through.
I have a different relationship with sleep.
Days awake are something I am obliged to do,
Each a task that I have to get through,
And that might not make much sense to you,
But it is one hundred percent true.
Sleep is my oxygen,
My remedy,
A place to escape my painful reality.
Each waking day a nightmare,
Each sleep affair,
Like a little prayer,
Sleep saves me from despair.
It pays no bother to depression,
Does not acknowledge my anxiety
I can breath and it sets me free.
I know I cannot lay dormant for the rest of my life,
But I am addicted to sleeps powers of avoiding pain and strife.
Some sleep’s are bad,
When my brain shuts down with disassociation,
Loosing all consciousness and concentration.
I cannot awake from.
Or dreams that make you sad,
As you wake up sobbing into a soaked pillow.
The worst,
Drunk with lethargy,
Eyelids glued shut,
I have no energy or motivation to move,
I feel sick to the stomach,
Have an aching head,
Crazed with a continuous mental and physical haze.
But still,
It is less pain then seeing the next day.
I sleep to keep my demons at bay!