Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes…

Why do we still set ourselves up?
To fail,
To fall,
To disappoint?
It’s no wonder that there has been an increase in stress and depression,
Whilst we contend with this obsession,
Of wrapping up the future in cotton wool.
Why have we not yet learnt,
That no lasting good reigns from being corrupt!?
Sugar is the Devil,
And only morons dare wear its coat!
It’s inevitable that we shall fall,
Fail,
And disappoint,
When we are inundated by lies and deceit,
From the very moment we take our first breath.
When eventually in receipt of the truth,
It is no wonder our worlds cave in,
Leaving us unfulfilled.
Micro managed via politics and money,
Man made ideals,
Man made rules,
That manipulate,
Build and dictate society,
We simply must conform,
Follow suit,
Abide,
And engage in reproduction.
Yet there is no Prince Charming or Fairy Godmother,
The human fuel to children’s dreams,
Tarnish those distributed by the sandman,
As adults,
We know this,
So why do we bother!?
Despite the catchy tune,
Even lullaby’s,
And Fairy Tale’s,
Are all rubbish and lies,
Heads,
Shoulders,
Knees,
And toes,
Is not actually about where your hand goes,
But preparation for all of the woes,
That we will surely face past puberty,
When the make believe stories loose their security,
We shall have overwhelmed heads,
Weight on our shoulders,
Fall to our knees,
From our down trodden toes,
Because life is not what we once thought it to be,
The way it was portrayed and told to be,
It will most likely end up nothing like your fantasy,
No rainbows and magic,
What an anti climax,
How tragic!
Real life is rarely like what dreams are made of,
But more of a living nightmare,
Full of pain,
Disappointment,
And despair,
The boogie man is not under your bed,
His everywhere.

Lies disguised in lullaby’s…

It’s not as easy as I had hoped it would be,
As it potentially could be,
But I don’t blame you,
Of cause I blame myself,
That’s just what I do,
But I don’t mean to put pressure on you.
I blame the fairy tales,
The “Little” white lies,
That help you fantasise through innocent eyes.
The dreams that your peers encourage,
The lies.
They know that fairy-god mother’s, giant peaches, enchanted wardrobes and kissing frogs,
Are all incorrect and officially unobtainable.
They pump you up full of air,
Pretending to care,
Like fattening and grooming an animal before slaughter,
Showing love,
Sharing warmth and affection before chopping off their heads,
Only to watch us pop,
Deflate and drop.
Our eyes then open to the black and grim grey of reality,
Where nothing is certain but fatality.
There is no magic.
All is bleak.
The streets are not paved with the gold that you seek,
But drenched in blood from the past, present and future.
Divorce and prenups are our ever after.
There is no happy,
It’s a complete disaster,
Would it be easier should we have always been told the truth?
Do they hold it back at our expense?
Or to encourage some hope before all is lost?
Lies disguised in lullaby’s,
Until we grow old and realise,
The truth.

Ain’t Ever Coming Back

Upsy Daisy,
Upside Down,
Whilst Life Is Spinning Round And Round,
Once Head Strong,
Old Head On Young Shoulders,
Instead Of Progression,
Dropped Down To Regression,
A Child Again.
Old Head,
Young Mind,
How It Happened I Cannot Describe,
But I Hope To Figure It All Out With You By My Side.
I Can’t Afford Nor Manage A Compromise.
Off Track.
Ran Off The Road.
Not Like You.
I Will Strive To Get On The Right Side.
Stop Standing Still,
Or Going Backwards,
And Find The Yellow Brick Road,
That Leads To The Gold And All Things Shiny And Nice.
God Forbid I Loose My Way Again.
Go Down The Wrong Path.
This Route Twice Over,
I Could Not Hack.
If I Find The Strength,
I Ain’t Ever Coming Back.

Disconnected

So very clearly disconnected,
I have forgotten the feeling of being whole,
Having control.
Eye’s wide open,
And a restless mind,
Yet motionless and still,
Paralysis has set.
I cannot move,
Yet I desire comfort,
To feel rested and self assured.
Completely separate,
Friction sparks,
Against one another,
Sending mixed signals.
Complete overdrive,
Yet running on empty.
Unsure of both,
Unable to do one.
My body remains static,
As my head jumps and skips from thought to thought.
And so this turmoil,
As it seems,
Is now my life.

Hope

Without hope what are we?
Without hope we are nothing.
Without hope, leaves us only with darkness.
Without hope, why bother at all.
Hope allows us to dream and achieve.
Hope allows us to live another day.
Hope helps clean the cobwebs away.
Hope is something that we have to learn.
Hope inspires us.
Hope allows us to turn nothing into greatness.
Hope can prove to be disappointing.
Hope can be misguiding.
Hope can be forgotten, but cannot get lost.
Hope is always there for you.
Hope is pure and true.
Hope.
Be hopeful.

And together we shall always be…

My eyes wonder up to the sky,
Where Angle’s and spirits lie.
I know that you travel across land and sea,
But sparkle in the sky and so I can see,
I feel you in my heart and all around,
Even though you don’t make a sound,
I know that you are protecting me,
And together we shall always be.

I die alone…

Why is it that I am consumed with misery and destined for misfortune? A rotten egg, the runt of the litter, I was dealt the hand of disappointment. No matter which direction that I take, all rotes are filled with poison. Given an enormous heart, full of love, crushed and never to be loved in return. I repel all potential suiters. From family to friends and lovers, deserted by all and destined for a life alone. There is no remedy. My heart was built to love, but cursed, I shall never receive it. My heart, like a machine propels, searches and targets those to love but unsuccessful, self combusts. Crushed. I feel the heavy pangs in my chest. How cruel is natures path? To allow me to love so deeply and desire almost desperately, yet nothing in return. People don’t understand. How could they, if they don’t know this pain. I wish it upon anyone. I do not wish an explanation upon them, why burden them with my woes? I was born Alone and alone I shall die. Smothered with rejection from my very first day. My love like an infection. I pledge just to love and be loved in return but receive nothing but cold isolation. As to why, I shall never know. Banished to the outskirts of society. Out of sight, out of mind. They forget me, whilst all I do is think of them. Driven to madness, I slowly fade away. Unloved, without partner nor child, just a void of unhappiness. Wither, wither, I die alone.

Somedays I am a prisoner to my bed, heavy eyelids and aching limbs control me…

I try to wake but when I do, I long for sleep again. Riddled with lethargy and a troubled mind, shackled to the bed, I only find peace in slumber.

Shakespeare,

“Be not afeard: the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight, and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears; and sometime voices,
That, if I then had wak’d after long sleep,
Will make me sleep again: and then, in dreaming,
The clouds methought would open and show riches
Ready to drop upon me; that, when I wak’d
I cried to dream again. ”

The Tempest (3.2.96-104)

She found peace…

Everyone felt guilty, scared, worried and unsure, but she didn’t. Deep in slumber, not a flicker of an eyelid, unaware of all the upset, she was fine, drifting in wonderland with candy floss clouds and stars that sing. Sleeping beauty sleapt, deep and undisturbed. Covered in protective sheets of dreams, spellbound, it seemed that she would sleep for eternity. “Let her be”, said the wise one, ” She needn’t wake just for our sakes. Our world is full of tragedy, pain, despair and death. Let her slumber and stay in her dreams, her own world. Life can be happier when you keep your world within. Using barb wire, nothing gets out, nothing gets in, all remains internalised. Ask yourself if she wants to be woken, or do you want to wake her for you? It would be selfish to wake her and bring her back to this world of pain and misery. She found peace, let her stay there!”