Seperately…

There’s no mistaking,
My heart is aching,
Tried to pause the breaking,
When I initially realised my mistaking,
In you not even contemplating how your actions might partake in,
The widening of the cracks,
Of our emotional and what I thought eternal,
And once seemingly unbreakable,
But now clearly tethered tracks,
I thought were forever attached,
To you.
Yet these cracks,
Cannot be patched,
Certainly not one sided,
I thought patience,
Forgiveness,
Tolerance,
Might awaken you,
Putting you first,
In silence,
Has only been more toxic to myself,
And hindered more than my emotions,
But my entire being and health.
Annoyingly so,
My love for you will never go,
As I learn and grow,
I realise more and more that sometimes in life,
You have to accept when people let people go,
As rejection and abandonment has always been the catalyst to my chronic pain,
It seems a turbulent conundrum to process this and practice being sane,
As I now feel like the procrastinator,
But letting you go is in fact not my choice,
But a last response,
To a false and perhaps subconscious ultimatum,
As following many predecessors you did the letting go,
Just wrapped in sheeps clothing,
You snaked me,
Forsaked me,
Cutting me off sneakilly, Somehow projected in complete silence,
The none verbatim,
Got me thinking I had a choice,
But this was never a puzzle,
Nor something I could resolve,
But what you silently controled,
I am a fool but not a troll,
And have come to the end of my mental and emotional toll.
Cast aside,
You let me go,
I will never understand why,
But now I get it,
That I don’t need to figure out how to now let you go,
That choice was revoked sometime ago.
You let me go.
You’ve gone already,
It pains me to contemplate the coward in you for not telling me so,
But words aren’t for everyone,
Yet your actions,
They make it clear,
You aren’t here anymore,
You’ve gone.
Left in your shadow is great sorrow,
But space for new life and love,
As seperately we dawn towards tomorrow.

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